Only a few days until Christmas and all I do miss you my angel. I pretend to be doing ok around friends and family but I'm just here. I sure miss you Darko. Love you, mom
mom | Merry Christmas | December 23, 2016 |
mom | Happy birthday Darko | November 13, 2016 |
mom | R. I. P. my Angel | November 1, 2016 |
mom | I love You Darko | July 27, 2016 |
I never pictured my life this way. With my son’s 8 years angelvarsary coming I feel like I haven’t taken a whole breath since he took his last one. I’m still straggling.
My calendars aren’t marked by birthdays and anniversaries anymore. Those happy days are long gone. I have 2 days out of a whole year that mean anything at all to me. November 14, a day that use to be a celebration, the day Darko was born. Now the only significance it holds is a reminder that he will be 20 forever. It’s just a sad day to sit on his grave and grieve for what could have been. Then there’s July 31th, a day that needs no calendar to mark- it’s forever embedded in my mind. The day my soul was ripped from my body and the life was sucked out of me. The day my family fell apart and a day that I will live for the remainder of my entirety here on this earth. The day Darko died.
See, when you lose a child, those 2 days are what a 12 month calendar consist of. We just survive everyone in between. I mean, how can you move forward when so much of you is missing?
I just wish I could tell my heart what my mind already knows. But sometimes, I still can’t believe he’s really gone.
Most days I feel the world is moving on without me. No matter how much time passes, it’s like I’m still in hospital with Darko praying for his recovery, I had so much to say to him, but so little time. I just kept telling him over and over again how sorry I was, how much I love him, and how we would be together again soon.
Each day I wish to wake ….. and finally be with him
Donna | in loving memory of Rade Ciric | July 26, 2016 |
mom | I love You | July 21, 2016 |
MORE THAN A DREAM
You visited me while I was sleeping.
You held my hand
as we drifted among the stars
whispering ''come with me mom,
I'll show you where I'm living now.''
...
Laughing together we floated
in and out of places
that were snatched from me
as soon as I awoke.
Remembering that
I had visited somewhere
beautiful with you
and you were happy.
mom | I love You Darko | July 7, 2016 |
mom | In my heart forever | June 11, 2016 |
mom | Always in my heart | June 1, 2016 |